Why do I do this?

I don't know anymore. This used to make me happy. Why doesn't it anymore? Why do I feel so alone? I wish I was older, maybe then I could at least know for sure I didn't like someone or if I did! HECK! Maybe I could even actually think I love someone for the first time! (And all those times in elementary school don't count, mind you!) I want someone I can hug at school without getting teased for it! What's the problem with getting a piggy-back ride from a guy I think of as my brother?! WHY CAN'T I JUST BE A SHADOW LIKE I USED TO BE?!?!?! Sure, I'm not considered fricking 'popular' (not like I would want to be, seeing how the 'populars' at our school act) but I'm getting more attention! NEGATIVE attention! Why do people make fun of me? Why do they like me? I don't do anything to deserve any of this. A girl who doesn't go to our school anymore tried video chatting me today. She's really, really nice, but I didn't know her very well. I freaked out... and declined her... twice... >_< Then I went invisible. I get teased for people liking me. The people who they're saying like me act like total JERKS. JERKY JERK JERK JERKS. And one person politely shakes his head and says no. Thank you for being polite Joseph. Grant and James.... I'M NOT A ROBOT, DON'T BE MEAN. AND WHY DID YOU STOP CHATTING ME IF YOU LIKE ME SO MUCH?!?! GOD!!! I want to cry and break one of our glasses on purpose at the same time. Maybe go on an evil rampage. I want to escape this world. Create my new one and transport there. Why can't I? Why can't I just be something important... I feel like Neville. From Harry Potter. -_- He's not an important character, he get's bullied a lot. ERGH. My head is going to explode from the frustration.


Thanks for listening to my rant. I'm not here right now though, please leave a message by clicking the 'Comment' button.

Ugh,
On D Brink Of Wishing To Die For A Second And Know What It's Like