My current life: Sumarized!

It's been one heck of a ride this year. I can't stand it. Also, apparently some girls in my class don't like me. That kinda sucks. But whatever.

Grant. Why. Just... Why. No. Not allowed. :(

Siiiiiiiiigh. My brother's friend is visiting, and despite the fact she claims she likes me more than him, I... can't help but think a middle school girl just doesn't do well hanging out with two college age kids. It just doesn't seem to work.

Also: I feel like a terrible person. My brother and his friends have an RP (role play) forum they use called Lovesick. Today my brother had it open on his computer while he was showing me something else. I memorized the URL (it was pretty short and easy), and went to it a little later. I wanted to make an account, so I did. It sent the authorization email, but I never authorized it. I just deleted my account. I had that feeling in my chest that I was doing something I shouldn't have been. And I guess I was. I don't want to join unless someone invites me too. It's like sneaking into claimed territory. It's HIS forum, with HIS online friends. I don't want to just... come in there and ruin his privacy and take all that away from him! Lately, he's been (as he says) 'disappoint' with me. I seriously don't want him to be. He's practically the only person left in the house I can TALK to, even though he's gone a lot, since he's going to college now.

I.... I just don't know what to do. It's complicated. I wish I could go back to being a naïve little kid. When I didn't have to worry about this. I wish a lot of things.

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